office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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