dude i'm inner monologue high
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
