dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
17 year olds will be the death of me.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
