I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
