apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize