Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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