you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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