there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
