so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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