It was confusing and full of hummus
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
