I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
