You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm having to shit out rocks
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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