why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize