Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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