why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize