With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
