i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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