I accidentally had phone sex last night
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
