Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
