im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
