i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
