Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize