How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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