Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Randomize
