"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
