it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
