There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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