Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
