you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
