You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize