Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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