Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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