butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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