i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
My vagina just clenched in fear
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
