I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
This toilet bowl is my home.
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