Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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