Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
