Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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