id be glad to
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize