I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize