I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
