He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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