Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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