just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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