Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize