Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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