my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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