you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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