there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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