Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
