Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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